#11: Seek community
I was surprised at how my old community didn’t stay my community after I had a child. If you asked me before I had a baby I would have told you I only have best friends. I didn’t believe in acquaintances. Well, I’m sad to say a lot of those friendships turned out not be lasting ones. Perhaps I will hear from some folks again if and when they have kids, or if and when they split with their partners and they no longer judge single parenthood as harshly, or when they have a moment in their lives when they realize not all their friendships are true and deep. I just with this one didn’t catch me by surprise. I would have started searching for my new community when I was pregnant! Now, rebuilding a community is not an overnight job, it takes a while. But here are some places you can start to look.
Yahoo listservs: sign in and then click the groups tab (it might be under More…). From there you can search for groups by keyword.
Meetup.com: If you don’t find what you are looking for, start your own!
Playgrounds: If you meet a parent you jive with – get his of her number and meet up on purpose! It’s a bold move but you won’t regret it!
Churches: I’ve been told that some churches have moms groups – and some even provide free childcare so moms can feel freed to talk.
Do you have tried and true places where you have made friends and community?